I'm from a little community in northern Saskatchewan called Turnor Lake, a hamlet and reserve where members of Birch Narrows Denesuline First Nation live. Most of my young life was spent around Buffalo Narrows with my grandparents, who had adopted me. I lost my grandfather when I was about nine years old. He was a trapper and lost his life out on the trapline, going through the ice.
I got into a bit of trouble as a young person and ended up in a foster home for a while. When I was about 14, the social services people asked me where I wanted to live. I said, "I want to go home. I want to be with my family and my siblings."
They made it happen, and that's when I moved to Turnor Lake.
My first language is Cree, my second language is English, and then I picked up the Dene language in Turnor Lake. I'm not fluent in Dene, but I can understand over 90 percent of it.
My journey with the Lord has been a long one, and it was God who started the journey. I think I was 16 years old at the time, and there were some young missionary trainees who had been sent to Turnor Lake for the summer to share the gospel. Our community is Catholic, so I had heard about Jesus and that He had died, but these young missionaries shared the gospel with me. One evening they asked me if I wanted to pray to receive Christ. I said, "For sure," and I knelt down and prayed, asking God to forgive me.
I knew something happened-something did occur in my life at that moment. I remember going outside that night and looking up at the stars and the heavens and seeing the awesomeness of God! It just kind of opened up like I had never seen it that way before.
That was the beginning, and it took me a long time to understand the grace of God. It's been quite a journey of going through some very dark periods in my life. But God has been good to me, in spite of my failings.
My wife, Rose, is one of those blessings. I met her within a few months of moving to Turnor Lake when I was 14 years old. We connected at that young age and just fell in love. It sounds crazy now, but we got married at 18 years of age.
No wonder my father was concerned! I still remember him coming and talking to me, and wondering if this was a good decision. But I can see that, through it all, God has had His hand on us. Over the years, the Lord helped me find jobs so that I could feed our family of three children. We never went hungry.
God provided a wife for me, and I'm glad that she hung on and didn't totally give up on me, because I had so many issues. I was very clingy. I was very dominating. I was overpowering and domineering and very jealous.
A lot of it had to do with my own issues. I had found someone who loved me, and I didn't want to lose this person, so I smothered her in our relationship.
But the day came when she couldn't take it any longer. I remember the day that she told me that she wanted me out of her life. She sat across from me and looked me right in the eye.
But even then, I didn't get it. I didn't understand-I thought everything was okay. I thought we were in love. Of course, that led me to do some soul searching. I had to look into my heart and into my life. I read some books that helped me to understand myself a little more. I had to deal with abandonment issues.
I tried to carry on with life without submitting to God, not obeying Him. I got tired of low-paying jobs, so I trained to be a schoolteacher. That required about eight years of education-first I had to get my Grade 12 before applying to university. Then I taught school in several places: some further north, and some in the Meadow Lake area, also closer around Turnor Lake, Buffalo Narrows and La Loche, commuting to work.
My wife and I separated, and I was always drinking quite a bit. Then there was a pivotal moment in my life where God really talked to me. I was living downstairs at my friend's place, and I was listening to the MBC radio station from La Ronge.
There was some gospel music, then about three short gospel messages: one in Cree, one in Dene, and one in English. I was just lying there listening, and then bang, all of a sudden, I heard God-not an audible voice, but a strong impression on my heart saying, "Ron, if you don't stop living the way you're living, are you going to die this way?" That freaked me out.
I fell on my knees right away and cried out, "Jesus, I believe in you, and I'm really sorry. Please forgive me for living like this."
By that point in my life, I had wandered away from God for over 20 years after professing to be a believer. At that moment, some Bible verses started coming back to me. I still remember pacing the floor that day, running over these verses in my mind.
I decided to call my wife. I had to talk to her, to clear things and to ask for forgiveness. She came over and sat across from me at the table.
"I decided today that I really want to live for the Lord." I said, "I really need to ask your forgiveness. There's things I've done that I have to tell you about."
I still get emotional when I tell what happened next. That sweet lady looked at me and said, "Ron, I don't need to hear it. Let's just move on."
She forgave me, so I was twice forgiven in just one day! It was too much for me to handle-I just got up and started sobbing.
So as I look back on my life, and as I grow in the faith, I'm beginning to understand more the significance of grace, the significance of what Jesus did for us. I knew how much hurt I had brought to God and to my wife. I'm so grateful that God did speak to me, and that I listened after all that time.
Today, I don't want to live in sin. I don't want it to be part of my life. I'm not perfect, but as the Holy Spirit nudges me and says, "Look, you'd better make that right," I know I have to be in obedience.
God has healed our marriage. I've already mentioned some of the things we had to work through in our lives. The key was forgiveness, and our faith allows us to be able to forgive each other.
Besides our three children, we have 12 grandchildren and three great-grandchildren. We're raising one of our grandchildren. We call him our little miracle baby. When he was born his little heartbeat was over 200, and we didn't think he was going to make it. He ended up in a medical home for two years with his special needs and then showed up on our doorstep when he was two years-old.
I retired from my employment as an educator, but have still done teaching contracts with high schools and adult education, which I really enjoy. Teaching was not always easy. There were times I never realized how much stress and anxiety it was causing in my life. But I'm grateful I could work in that profession all those years.
There have been times in my life when I have felt under spiritual attack-both when I was far from God, and even when I am walking closer to Him. When I heard voices and couldn't sleep, I didn't understand at first that it was an attack from dark forces, and I don't understand why God allowed it.
I began to see that I wasn't the only one going through that, and others Christians have, too. But I've learned to cry out to the Lord. Reading God's Word and praying have helped me to get victory.
The last few years I've gotten involved in music ministry. I love writing songs, playing the guitar, and sharing those songs with others. I've had the opportunity to share those songs in places, and with our little fellowship group in our community with the other believers there. I don't see myself as a pastor, but I do try to take a leadership role here for us.
I continue to learn from the Scriptures about God's grace to me. The very fact that I desire holiness-that I desire righteousness-comes from God. I myself am not capable of it, and so that tells me that God is in my life. God is working. He's doing things.
Adapted from a Tribal Trails video interview with Ron. Enjoy more testimonies at TribalTrails.org.
